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Turkey Day Football: No Thanks Given By Fantasy Football

Posted on November 27, 2009 by Joe Gill
Aaron Rodgers threw 348 yards and 3 touchdowns on Turkey Day.

Aaron Rodgers threw 348 yards and 3 touchdowns on Turkey Day.

Yes Fantasy Football ruined my Turkey Day.

My opponent didn’t give me any thanks at all. I guess that’s what happens when you go against Donald Driver, Aaron Rodgers, Ryan Grant, and Miles Austin when they play the pathetic Lions and lowly Raiders.

No favorable matchups for me!

After a painful loss last week by 2.3 points, I am now only 1 game up in the division at 7-4 after losing 2 out of 3 games.

Thanks to Kris Brown for botching his tying field goal versus the Titans. If you made it, I would have won and could have enjoyed my holiday more.

Kickers even ruin fantasy football when they miss a kick!

Thanks for nothing!

This week is a must win against my arch nemesis Voice of Doom who has already beaten me this season.

Two more losses and I may not make the post season unthinkable 4 weeks ago when I was sitting pretty at 6-2.

Damn you fantasy football gods!

GAME ONE: Detroit versus Green BayCup-of-Joe8-300x290

The Lions stink, even though they beat my pathetic Browns last week on a pass interference call on a last second Hail Mary.

They showed some promise recovering the opening kickoff fumble to go up 7-0.

It was lights out after that as Aaron Rodgers and Donald Driver made me choke on my sweet potatoes and stuffing.

FINAL SCORE: Packers 34, Lions 12

Rodgers torched Detroit for 348 yards and 3 touchdowns. Driver went off as well reeling in 7 catches for 142 yards and a score.

Ryan Grant had a sub par game putting up 100 yards of total offense (well at least someone didn’t go bananas on the stat sheet!)

These three players alone put 75 up on me and I couldn’t do a damn thing about it.

Even Packers tight end, Jermichael Finely, couldn’t help me. He posted a measly 5.50 points.

God forbid, Mr. Rodgers could have spread the wealth!

GAME TWO: Oakland versus Dallas

Oakland may be just as bad as Detroit. They did, however, get a gift wrapped win versus the Bengals last week.

Tony Romo and Miles “Damn You” Austin carved up the Oakland secondary like Dad cutting up the turkey on T-giving day.

Miles Austin (who I passed over for Donnie Avery! UGH!) torched the Raiders for 145 yards on 7 catches and a TD. Of course, he scored earlier but he was ruled down.

Disaster averted? Yeah Right!

Tony Romo found him on the very next play for the score!

I have intergestion and heartburn.

It’s not from the food that my girlfriend’s sister made. It was their first Thanksgiving and they did a stellar job (They are from the Philippines).

It was the butt whooping I was receiving and sat there helplessly taking it!

FINAL SCORE: Cowboys 24, Raiders 7

Ok there was still hope!

Now with the addition of the NFL Network on Thursday night, I had chance for redemption.

After going into a turkey coma while watching Angels and Demons (which was really, really bad), it was time for even more pigskin!

Giants receiver, Steve Smith, got me 7 catches for 71 yards during garbage time versus Denver.

Giants receiver, Steve Smith, got me 7 catches for 71 yards during garbage time versus Denver.

GAME THREE: Giants versus Broncos

The Giants broke their losing streak versus Atlanta last week and the Broncos were sinking as fast as the Titanic.

However, I had a feel Denver was going to win.

The Giants especially Eli Manning looked awful.

Before I could down my ice cream sundae (a new Thanksgiving tradition), the Broncos had a 16-0 lead and Steve Smith had one lousy catch for 8 yards! UGH!

This just isn’t my Fantasy Football Day at all.

FINAL SCORE: Broncos 26, Giants 6

Steve Smith almost brought a semi-grin to my face with a 7 catch for 71 yard performance. Gotta love GARBAGE TIME!

VOICE OF DOOM: 104.90

STEAMING CUP OF JOE: 19.60

As they say, it’s all how you finish.

And I need to finish strong!

Go Chris Johnson!

Go Frank Gore!

Go Carson Palmer and Ochocinco!

Go Marques Colston (just don’t score too much against my Patriots)!


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